Alexander Hamilton: “did they just rhyme father with father and farther?”

Aaron Burr, Sir: “this antisocial man is so done with this overeager puppy and this random ass boyband”

My Shot: the overeager puppy joins the boyband. somehow becomes the front man of the band. they gain lots of fans.

The Story of Tonight: The boyband covers a song from les mis???

The Schuyler Sisters: WHERES YOUR GOD NOW @ boyband.

Farmer Refuted: boyband has a hater. Front man puppy roasts hater before he can he even start to talk.

You’ll be back: to be sung draped over a piano with with champagne fake crying into a handkerchief

Right Hand Man: “there’s a moment you know… you’re fucked. aND THATS RN PEOPLE I SWEAR TO GOD.

A Winters Ball: “20 year old males who drink are gross and do gross 20 year old drunk male things”

Helpless: “this could be the start of something new it feels so right being here with you”

Satisfied: “I’ve done fucked up”

The Story of Tonight reprise: the boyband gets drunk and harass the antisocial man (again)

wait for it: the song that could get away with going on the radio

Stay Alive: tfw ur dad doesn’t trust you to lead an army #relatable

Ten Duel Commandments: “Revolutionary men have fragile pride and I don’t know why they were trusted with guns”

Meet Me Inside: “the puppy gets fired because he got mad that his father figure acknowledges the fact that he’s a father figure”

That Would Be Enough: “you’re not even a father figure you’re a legit father”

Guns and Ships: “surprise bitch, tis I le baguette here to win the war”

history has it’s eyes on you: I fucked up once. and now it’s your turn to.

Yorktown (the world turned upside down): surprise BITch (part 2) herCULES MULLIGAN-

What comes next?: I’m petty as shit.

Dear Theodosia: “Burr imma let you finish but, loOk AT MY SON

Non-Stop: the puppy and boyband have been separated since the war so the puppy decides to go into law then government

What’d I miss: the war??? wtf???

Cabinet Battle #1: “I know more than you” -Ron Swanson

Take A Break: use your fucking commas and don’t use child actors to play your children

Say No to This: … you are singing the word “no” you should be able to say it

The Room Where it Happens: the banjo turn up of the century

Schuyler Defeated: antisocial man and the puppy have a falling out

Cabinet Battle #2: (sips tea) (slowly puts it down and turns)….. you must be out of yoUR GODDAMN MIND IF YOU THINK-

Washington on your side: I am ready to throw punches

One Last Time: I’m tired… I think I’m gonna go home now.

I Know Him: The John Adams Roast begins

The Adams Administration: The Roast continues

We Know: well fuck,we actually didn’t know

Hurricane: I will roast myself and save everyone else the trouble of doing it.

The Reynolds Pamphlet: “YOU MUsT BE OUT OF YOUR GOD DAMN MIND” -Angelica, and literally the whole cast

Burn: I have no words, only tears.

Blow us all away: you thought it would be okay… you were wrong.

Stay Alive (reprise): tears intensify

It’s Quiet Uptown: full fledged sobbing 2 minutes into the song

The Election of 1800: ham and jefferson roast burr to the point of no return

Your Obedient Servant: the slightly bitchy passive aggressive anthem

Best Of Wives, Best of Women: a single tear because we all know what’s gonna happen next

The World Was Wide Enough: “most disputes die and no one shoots” is the biggest goddamn lie in the show

Who Lives Who Dies Who Tells Your Story: hello death I welcome thee.