It’s Bad Advice Tuesday over at The Establishment, and if you’re wondering where people want to be when they get elaborate scoldy lectures about water use, the answer is: The gym shower!
“After 32 years of marriage, my wife went out and got a tattoo on her shoulder. It’s about 8 inches by 6 inches (quite large), and she did it without any advance discussion with me, which has left me sort of shocked. Her position is that it’s her body and she’ll do what she wants. This has driven a wedge between us, and I’m not sure if we can move forward. What is your advice?”
The Bad Advisor answers this and two other high-quality zingers over yonder.
“I have a pet peeve about wasting food or water.
At my local aquatic center, after swimming I have noticed that some bathers just stand in the shower upward of 15 minutes, allowing the water to merely run down the drain.
It drives me crazy, knowing that there’s such scarcity of clean drinking water in many parts of the world, and these clueless women are wasting so much of it!
(I only use water to wet down and then to rinse off the soap. In between, I turn it off.)
I’d like your opinion on what I should say or do.
Would it be impolite to call this to the attention of the perpetrators, or should I just grit my teeth and mind my own business?”
— From “Not Water Logged” via “Ask Amy,” Washington Post, 6 March 2017
Dear Not Water Logged,
There is nothing people appreciate more than being berated while naked, unless it is being berated while naked and wet. Naked, wet people are primed to listen carefully to lengthy lectures about the solvency of earth’s water supply, all the better if said screeds are delivered by a stranger at the local gym. The prevention of humanity’s untimely and thirsty demise rests on you and you alone, and the only way to end water waste is to holler at tired, damp people who don’t know you from Adam. You can be assured that they will spread your message — probably to the gym’s management.
Hearseeno 