Alexander Hamilton: “did they just rhyme father with father and farther?”
Aaron Burr, Sir: “this antisocial man is so done with this overeager puppy and this random ass boyband”
My Shot: the overeager puppy joins the boyband. somehow becomes the front man of the band. they gain lots of fans.
The Story of Tonight: The boyband covers a song from les mis???
The Schuyler Sisters: WHERES YOUR GOD NOW @ boyband.
Farmer Refuted: boyband has a hater. Front man puppy roasts hater before he can he even start to talk.
You’ll be back: to be sung draped over a piano with with champagne fake crying into a handkerchief
Right Hand Man: “there’s a moment you know… you’re fucked. aND THATS RN PEOPLE I SWEAR TO GOD.
A Winters Ball: “20 year old males who drink are gross and do gross 20 year old drunk male things”
Helpless: “this could be the start of something new it feels so right being here with you”
Satisfied: “I’ve done fucked up”
The Story of Tonight reprise: the boyband gets drunk and harass the antisocial man (again)
wait for it: the song that could get away with going on the radio
Stay Alive: tfw ur dad doesn’t trust you to lead an army #relatable
Ten Duel Commandments: “Revolutionary men have fragile pride and I don’t know why they were trusted with guns”
Meet Me Inside: “the puppy gets fired because he got mad that his father figure acknowledges the fact that he’s a father figure”
That Would Be Enough: “you’re not even a father figure you’re a legit father”
Guns and Ships: “surprise bitch, tis I le baguette here to win the war”
history has it’s eyes on you: I fucked up once. and now it’s your turn to.
Yorktown (the world turned upside down): surprise BITch (part 2) herCULES MULLIGAN-
What comes next?: I’m petty as shit.
Dear Theodosia: “Burr imma let you finish but, loOk AT MY SON
Non-Stop: the puppy and boyband have been separated since the war so the puppy decides to go into law then government
What’d I miss: the war??? wtf???
Cabinet Battle #1: “I know more than you” -Ron Swanson
Take A Break: use your fucking commas and don’t use child actors to play your children
Say No to This: … you are singing the word “no” you should be able to say it
The Room Where it Happens: the banjo turn up of the century
Schuyler Defeated: antisocial man and the puppy have a falling out
Cabinet Battle #2: (sips tea) (slowly puts it down and turns)….. you must be out of yoUR GODDAMN MIND IF YOU THINK-
Washington on your side: I am ready to throw punches
One Last Time: I’m tired… I think I’m gonna go home now.
I Know Him: The John Adams Roast begins
The Adams Administration: The Roast continues
We Know: well fuck,we actually didn’t know
Hurricane: I will roast myself and save everyone else the trouble of doing it.
The Reynolds Pamphlet: “YOU MUsT BE OUT OF YOUR GOD DAMN MIND” -Angelica, and literally the whole cast
Burn: I have no words, only tears.
Blow us all away: you thought it would be okay… you were wrong.
Stay Alive (reprise): tears intensify
It’s Quiet Uptown: full fledged sobbing 2 minutes into the song
The Election of 1800: ham and jefferson roast burr to the point of no return
Your Obedient Servant: the slightly bitchy passive aggressive anthem
Best Of Wives, Best of Women: a single tear because we all know what’s gonna happen next
The World Was Wide Enough: “most disputes die and no one shoots” is the biggest goddamn lie in the show
Who Lives Who Dies Who Tells Your Story: hello death I welcome thee.
Hearseeno 